ROW to Cote Grave(s)

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ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby curt » Sun Jun 05, 2011 11:44 pm

Chuck Cote brought a family squabble regarding his father's (and mother's ?) grave to the BOS last week.

It is the first discussion item after the opening of the meeting:
http://vimeo.com/24646235

289:14 Right of Way to Private Burial Ground. – Any person wishing to have a temporary right of entry over private land in order to enter a private burial ground enclosure to which there is no public right of way may apply in writing to the selectmen of a town or the mayor of a city stating the reason for such request and the period of time for which such right is to be exercised. The applicant shall also notify in writing the owner or occupier of the land over which the right of way is desired. The selectmen or mayor, in the exercise of discretion and in consultation with the cemetery trustees, may issue a permit for such temporary right of entry designating the particular place where the land may be crossed. The owner or occupier of the land may recommend the place of crossing which, if reasonable, shall be the place designated by the selectmen or mayor.

Source. 1994, 318:2, eff. Aug. 7, 1994.


Note the word "discretion." The BOS don't have to do anything. I think they would be crazy to get involved in this.

It is easy to notify any potential buyer that there is an unmarked grave on the property. Chuck can record an affidavit at the registry of deeds detailing the facts of the matter. I did that once regarding some family property. The key thing is to mention the principals, the parents, Dottie, any trust that might have been established. You can have the registry of deeds index the document on any name that is contained in the document. Then when a title search is done, the document will pop out.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby TomBillbroughJr » Sun Jun 05, 2011 11:59 pm

curt wrote:Chuck Cote brought a family squabble regarding his father's (and mother's ?) grave to the BOS last week.


There are no graves on the property. My grandfather, Alfred Cote, was cremated and had his ashes spread on the estate land, as per his wishes. My grandmother, Patricia Cote, is buried in Lynnfield, MA. This is just a childish attempt to slow the sale of the estate property and detour potential buyers.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 7:57 am

Family members cease to be family members when some of them do immoral, unethical and callous acts. Shawn why don’t you give me your opinion on this scenario since you like to throw in your “two cents worth.”

My father died in 2004 and his final wishes were to have his cremated remains buried and were interred into hallow ground in his backyard overlooking his children (who remained living in the Danville area) their properties and his grandchildren. He wished for his property to remain in the family to be used as rental property until one of the grandchildren was older and settled enough to live in.

Most people would think that these are simple requests, right?? But now comes the shocking part???

Tom JR and his parents (Tom SR and Dottie) all decide that they would rather sell the property to a stranger so that they could make a profit off the property and list it for sale. Now because having “grandpa” buried in the backyard seems to creepy, and may lower the value , they decide to dig up his remains from his burial site, removed the stone and throw his remains onto town property.

My children no longer have a grave site to visit and leave flowers, just as they had done in the past 5 years Our local law enforcement refuses to charge them with desecrating a grave site because it did not happen within a cemetery?? ( yes there is police reports , and they admitted to the removal )

The stone and remains are now in the center of the cul-de sac . On cote drive , the grave is open to the public feel free to lift the stone and look under it , you will see grandpa distinct gray ashes and if you dig around a bit will find teeth and bones fragment.

I have emails and text messages from the family saying she removed him so she could sell the property , if the family continues to change there story saying things like his ashes had been spread on the property , then I will post the emails and text messages

My wishes are simple . The family needs to do the right thing , and put him back and create a right of way to the site

Sorry to bring this to the town , but the law allows the selectmen to create the easement

Thanks Chuck
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby shawn_oneil » Mon Jun 06, 2011 8:24 am

momof3 wrote:Family members cease to be family members when some of them do immoral, unethical and callous acts. Shawn why don’t you give me your opinion on this scenario since you like to throw in your “two cents worth.”

My father died in 2004 and his final wishes were to have his cremated remains buried and were interred into hallow ground in his backyard overlooking his children (who remained living in the Danville area) their properties and his grandchildren. He wished for his property to remain in the family to be used as rental property until one of the grandchildren was older and settled enough to live in.

Most people would think that these are simple requests, right?? But now comes the shocking part???

Tom JR and his parents (Tom SR and Dottie) all decide that they would rather sell the property to a stranger so that they could make a profit off the property and list it for sale. Now because having “grandpa” buried in the backyard seems to creepy, and may lower the value , they decide to dig up his remains from his burial site, removed the stone and throw his remains onto town property.

My children no longer have a grave site to visit and leave flowers, just as they had done in the past 5 years Our local law enforcement refuses to charge them with desecrating a grave site because it did not happen within a cemetery?? ( yes there is police reports , and they admitted to the removal )

The stone and remains are now in the center of the cul-de sac . On cote drive , the grave is open to the public feel free to lift the stone and look under it , you will see grandpa distinct gray ashes and if you dig around a bit will find teeth and bones fragment.

I have emails and text messages from the family saying she removed him so she could sell the property , if the family continues to change there story saying things like his ashes had been spread on the property , then I will post the emails and text messages

My wishes are simple . The family needs to do the right thing , and put him back and create a right of way to the site

Sorry to bring this to the town , but the law allows the selectmen to create the easement

Thanks Chuck


I will present my opinion at the Board of Selectmen meeting tonight.
Shawn
Shawn O'Neil


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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 8:51 am

thanks Shawn but please keep in mind, my fathers original burial site will always be his resting place. My fathers cremated remains were not scattered but kept as a complete unit and buried that way due to religious reasons. The stone I purchased was then placed. My father was interred into hallow ground by the pastor and he needs to be returned.

If I go to the town hall and remove the sign and put it somewhere else, does that mean that the Town Hall location has changed?? Of course not.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby SBinRockrimmon » Mon Jun 06, 2011 9:51 am

If it hasn't been done already, I think more research needs to be done. The way I read this is the RSA posted above applies when a person must cross private property to access a cemetery. It also appears to me that the cemetery trustees must also be consulted.

The selectmen or mayor, in the exercise of discretion and in consultation with the cemetery trustees, may issue a permit for such temporary right of entry designating the particular place where the land may be crossed


Some other bits of interest....

http://www.nhcemetery.org/content/state-laws

289:3 Location. – All cemeteries and burial grounds shall be laid out in accordance with the following requirements:
I. No cemetery shall be laid out within 100 feet of any dwelling house, schoolhouse or school lot, store or other place of business without the consent of the owner of the same, nor within 50 feet of a known source of water or the right of way of any classification of state highway. Existing cemeteries which are not in compliance with the above set-back requirements may be enlarged, provided that no portion of the enlargement is located any closer to the above-listed buildings, water sources or highways than the existing cemetery, and provided further that no such enlargement shall be located within 50 feet of any classification of state highway.
II. Burials on private property, not in an established burial ground, shall comply with local zoning regulations. In the absence of such regulations, such burial sites shall comply with the requirements in paragraph I. The location of the burial site shall be recorded in the deed to the property upon transfer of the property to another person.


If this was less than 100 feet from the dwelling was consent given from the owner? I'm aware that the owner was most likely deceased, but was consent given in a will, or by the estate?

Aside from all of this I believe this may be defined as scattering of ashes, and not considered to be a burial.

I know you can bury ashes (generally still in a urn) at a cemetery in a plot, but if you dig a shallow hole in your backyard and scatter the ashes and bury them (less the urn) I'm not sure it qualifies. I'll be interested to what the BOS came up with and what legal advice they may have been given. I think it may be best to consult an attorney on this one.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 10:19 am

I have consulted an Attorney and he is the one who told me to go to the town to get the right of way to the burial site. My mom did not pass away until 2009 and my fathers wishes were followed with her consent and presence. Once again the ashes were interred as a complete unit into hallow ground due to religious reasons. The Pastor had to come to the property to properly get this done. I just find my sister to be very cold, callous and a disgusting individual to just dig up my father like that, furthermore did she get all of him?? Is parts of my dad buried between two differnt places now?
Last edited by momof3 on Mon Jun 06, 2011 11:46 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby TomBillbroughJr » Mon Jun 06, 2011 11:40 am

There was a Pastor and a religious ceremony now? This sob story keeps getting better.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 11:50 am

both the mormon and congregational church's sacramented the ground prior to my father being placed. Do not remember if you were even there but yes it had been all done, conforming to both religions.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby TomBillbroughJr » Mon Jun 06, 2011 11:57 am

momof3 wrote:both the mormon and congregational church's sacramented the ground prior to my father being placed. Do not remember if you were even there but yes it had been all done, conforming to both religions.


Hm, if by "benders" you mean, "living in reality" then yes, I was on a hell of a bender at that time. Where were you?
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 12:10 pm

Well I am surprised the town has not placed a cease and desist order against the estate for moving my dad and his marker onto town property without permission.

Prior to me approaching the BOS, Shawn was even aware that this had all happened. So Shawn how come you knew but not the entire BOS??
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby curt » Mon Jun 06, 2011 4:56 pm

I wonder if there would be support for a warrant article to discontinue Cote Drive as a public highway, reverting it to the private road that it used to be?

Then we could just leave the clan to fight among themselves.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby TomBillbroughJr » Mon Jun 06, 2011 5:51 pm

"Clan" evokes a suggestion of unity. I'd say we're neighbors at best and that is only due to our misfortune of their geographical location. I see no reason to not keep Cote Drive as a public highway. There is no one buried in the roundabout garden, but we did put the headstone there as an act of civility so that no one party would feel slighted, but after talking with the Highway Department we removed it. It has been removed for sometime now. It is unfortunate that charles and his lovely bride feel the need to seek a larger audience for this family matter, but at least everyone gets to see what my family has been dealing with for years. I'm sure once this blows over we'll get to hear of a new scheme to stall the estate sale and devalue the property. They have already tried and failed to get grazing rights and an easement to "their" apartments over the estate land. We'll see what happens next.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 5:57 pm

Would not happen Curt. Only reason why Cote Drive even exists is because Chuck and his other brother in law built the road and then Chuck and I paid to have it paved. Dot and Tom have always been lazy and cheap, never offering to help pay for anything, ie: headstones for parents or the road which they drive over everyday. Heck they even refuse to help keep the grass mowed and the bank of mailboxes free of snow every winter. In other words if we could have picked our relatives then it would not have been them. Yeah I know TMI.
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Re: ROW to Cote Grave(s)

Postby momof3 » Mon Jun 06, 2011 6:01 pm

Tomjr you are an idiot! Never tried for "grazing rights" as you stated but the right of way to the apartment building is classified as a "prescriptive easement" since it has been used for over 20 years now. This issue is still with the attorneys and will go to the supreme court if necessary. So why don't you take the diploma that you bought on line and put it to good use, like maybe looking and reading the facts!
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